
INFORMATION IS KEY:
While I have been walking around with a "woe-is-me" attitude because I have been made celiba
I DID IT, AND I DIDN'T DIE:
The second major exciting takeway from my recent rejection is that I was able to put myself out there--no not like that...get your mind out of the gutter. I mean, I identified something I wanted (whether it was meant for me or not is a different story) and I did what I could to get it. I have never in my 26 years ever communicated to a man that I was interested in him. I usually wind up with the one that pursues the hardest, chases the longes
t and after I exhaust from running (and with the aid of social lubricants like alchohol), I give in. Last New Years, my goal was to break this cycle, and be active in my selection, as opposed to sitting around waiting to be harpooned. And, if nothing else, I accomplished this. At least I can say that I was rejected by the most intellectual, and unequivocally handsome man I have ever known. Better to be rejected by smart and sexy than go out with the loser who can always do a lunch date because he never has a job.
The second major exciting takeway from my recent rejection is that I was able to put myself out there--no not like that...get your mind out of the gutter. I mean, I identified something I wanted (whether it was meant for me or not is a different story) and I did what I could to get it. I have never in my 26 years ever communicated to a man that I was interested in him. I usually wind up with the one that pursues the hardest, chases the longes

I CAN STOP WONDERING, AND MOVE ON:
This one is simple, but not nearly appreciated the way it should be. Once you know, you can move on. And close the door (as necessary). There is no wondering because you gave it a go, and well, it didn't go. If it wasn't meant to be, then so be it, but at least you don't need to create fantasies or lose sleep wondering what woulda, shoulda, coulda because it can't.
This one is simple, but not nearly appreciated the way it should be. Once you know, you can move on. And close the door (as necessary). There is no wondering because you gave it a go, and well, it didn't go. If it wasn't meant to be, then so be it, but at least you don't need to create fantasies or lose sleep wondering what woulda, shoulda, coulda because it can't.
So, if you're feeling up for it, put yourself out there today. Every day. As good friend said to me last night, after wine had numbed the original pain we suffered from our mutual recent rejections, "Put it out there. Why not?" Just to put it into perspective, think of how many doors have been slammed in the face of Black people over centuries. Without those doors closing, the desire for change would have never come about. And we would not have all eventually shared the historic moment that we did on January 20th, as we watched the inauguration of the first African-American President whether at home, out in the cold, online, on TV or the radio. You can't know what you want or appreciate what you have without these pains. Rejection is a part of life.
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